I Am Not Skilled To Understand

I really relate to the title of this poem/song by Dora Greenwell. It’s funny how the words to some songs are still relevant even almost 200 years later. There are so many things in life that I just don’t understand.

Some things are easy for me to just not understand … like why people would want to go up in a hot air balloon when they could be quite comfortable on the ground? Or why planes don’t just fall to the ground. Other things tear me up, like why did my sweet friend’s baby have to be born with so many birth-defects that he didn’t live past two months of age? And then why was it so important to her that Larry and I hold him after he was dead? Why did her boyfriend have to be such a jerk?

No matter how many days go by, I never seem to run out of things that I don’t understand, things that I just wish would stop or go away. On April 21, 2009 Texas A&M honored all of their alumni who had died. My friend, Kevin’s son’s name was called during the roll call.

I just don’t get it. I am NOT skilled to understand … why God would take my friend before her kids were grown? … Nevertheless, I thank God, He took her before her son was killed in that accident … how could you live through that? How does my friend Kevin make it through each day?

Jesus told us, “The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life.” John 6:63. Then He says, “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me.” John 14:1

Wow, trust is such a strong concept and yet it is so fragile to hold onto. Still, God has never let me down: Comforting me through many very dark nights (I was afraid of the dark) when I was young. Healing my body from mononucleosis when I was 15. Leading me to trust Him when I wanted a child but after 3 years of trying still we were not pregnant. Then trusting that only child to Him when he turned blue and nearly died for no apparent reason when he was 5 months old. Being my friend when we moved yet again (military) and I had to start all over making friends and learning a new place. Holding on to me while Larry, my husband, battled cancer. Giving me hope of life after the kids left home and the nest was empty. Trusting that He really did know what He was doing when He sent us to live in New Mexico.

I love the tag that Aaron Shust added to Dora's song in 2007:
My Savior loves! My Savior lives!

My Savior’s always there for me!
My God, He was. My God, He is.

My God, He’s always gonna be!

My God has always been there for me … I mean even when I didn’t understand what was going on … and there’s some things I don’t guess I’ll ever understand … but “I KNOW whom I have believed and I am persuaded that He is able to keep that which I’ve committed unto Him against that day!” I pray that you will truly be able to trust God. I pray that you will read His word, the Bible, because I know that those words will breathe a fresh wind of life into you and those words will bring you peace even when you don’t understand.

I Am Not Skilled To Understand
By Dora Greenwell 1821-1882

I am not skilled to understand
What God hath willed, what God hath planned
I only know at His right hand
Stands One who is my Savior

I take Him at His word and deed
“Christ died to save me” this I read
And in my heart I find a need
Of Him to be my Savior

That He should leave His place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange? So once did I
Before I knew my Savior

And O that He fulfilled may see
The travail of His soul in me
And with His work contented be
As I with my dear Savior

Yes, living, dying, let me bring
My strength, my solace, from this spring
That He who lives to be my King
Once died to be my savior

Tag: by Aaron Shust
My Savior loves! My Savior lives!

My Savior’s always there for me!
My God, He was. My God, He is.

My God, He’s always gonna be!

What's In A Name?

by Barbara Chadwick


We had a couple visiting in church. When I asked the man’s name he said, “ My name is Sam” and I thought, “Of course!” He looked like a Sam to me.

As pregnant mothers we often look in “Names” books for the best names for our babies. We want to know how the name feels on our tongues when we say it and we want to know the meaning of the name.

I was reading I Kings 5:5 in my morning devotional and was so interested to read that Solomon was going to build a house or a temple for the “Name” of the LORD. My thought was why wasn’t he going to build a house or temple for the LORD God or for Jehovah? Why was it to be for God’s Name? So I looked in the Preacher’s Commentary and found this:

“I propose to build a house for the name of the LORD …" Not for the Lord, but for the name of the Lord. The Hebrews reverenced the name of the Lord so deeply, they would not even speak it, substituting instead the word Adonai meaning "Lord." God's name was the manifestation of the divine nature in a visible sign as a pledge of His presence. They considered the name almost as sacred as God Himself, and to build a house for His name was tantamount to building it for God. Ancient cultures, including the Hebrews, believed that to know the name of a deity allowed the worshiper to claim the power of that deity.

After reading this portion this week I was wondering about my body being the “house” for my name. For our Bible study in Sunday School I’m supposed to be memorizing I Corinthians 6:19-20: “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.”

So, if I propose to “build” a place in my body for God’s Name or for the Holy Spirit to reside what will I do?

First and foremost I will confess my sins to God and ask Him to be my Savior. At that point the Holy Spirit will reside in me. If God, through the Holy Spirit resides in me I will want to do things that will bring glory to His Name. Things like, reading His Word, praying, fellowshipping with other believers. I will love God with all my heart, all my soul and all my mind; (Matt. 22:37) and I will love other people.

Reading about how Solomon made the Temple and the beautiful things he put in it made me remember that there are times I have put things in my mind that are not beautiful like books I’ve read or movies I’ve watched. Also, there are times when I let emotions that do not honor God control my mind.

Lord God, I pray that when people hear my name the picture that comes to mind will be a picture that brings honor to your Name. Also, I pray that I will not let my emotions rule my actions but that my actions will bring glory to Your Name.

Because Friends Are Worth It!

This morning a good friend called to apologize. We’d been at her house last night to celebrate the Passover (Messianic style) and things got hectic and she got upset and was a little snippy … feelings were getting dangerously close to being really hurt. But then we both decided to just enjoy the evening and not let it get to us.

Anyways, she said that earlier in the day, she was trying to set things up for the Seder outside on her front patio. The wind was really gusting. Then she’d walk into the house and everything was really calm and peaceful and then back outside and it was gusty and aggravating.

Well this morning she realized that God was showing her another way that He can speak to us. In the past she always knew that God was speaking to her about something because she had a peace in her heart but yesterday God spoke to her in an outward way … He spoke through a physical feeling of peace. There was a peace in the house and there definitely was not a peaceful feeling outside. But she just pushed through because she had a plan and she knew what she wanted. In the end we had to move everything inside anyways, because the wind was knocking over the vases. That was when things got short. I just jumped in and started moving things and she hadn’t made the decision to actually move inside yet and looks were exchanged and muttered words … well, you know the rest. If you’re any age at all you’ve experienced something similar … just fill in the blanks.

Well, this morning God woke me up talking to me about being willing to take a hit for someone else. Because I’m not usually willing to just cover for someone or to take some pain just so that someone else will feel better or whatever. Then He reminded about how willing I am/was to jump in and save my kids from pain or to save my parents from embarrassment. But I’m not so easy/willing to jump in and do the same thing for friends or even for my husband … he should be willing to do that for me … right? But isn’t that what Jesus did for me? Isn’t that what He still does for me?

The really cool thing was that God spoke to two different women about loving each other and caring for one another. To my friend He let her know that she needed to apologize for being snippy. To me He let me know that I needed to be more sensitive and ready to forgive: Because love covers a multitude of sins. Because Someone forgave us once and is still forgiving us. Because friends are worth it.

Garbage

by Barbara Chadwick


Yesterday morning, a policewoman rang the doorbell. I had just poured the softened yeast into the mixture of a beautiful new recipe. So I run to the door.

"Ma'am" she says, "the ravens have taken the lid off your garbage can and scattered the trash. Here in Juneau we enforce the trash ordinance. You have to get a bungee cord for your lid. The garbage truck is just down the street and you have to pick up your scattered trash before he gets here." I look down the street and sure enough he looks too close. I look out at the curb then back at her and swallow and say, "Yes, ma'am, thank you."

Frustration, or could there be another word! My new recipe. The yeast!

As she walks off I close the door and run to grab my boots because there's snow on the ground. Then I run out the door to try to beat the garbage man. Half the can is strewn around everywhere. Mad. I am mad! I'm picking up all this stinky garbage and the thought comes to me that the ravens brought food to Elijah to sustain him. I always thought that was beautiful until now. It's too much for one person to get before the trash truck gets here so I run in to call Kenneth for help. He's at the church studyingfor Sunday's sermon.

Finally, I get back in the kitchen and finish mixing the dough. Then I knead it. Knead it? I pounded it! When it was set in the bowl to rise I sat down at the table and ate a whole brownie. Was it just yesterday that I was trying to get dressed and had to put on three pairs of pants before I found one that fit? I made a firm decision then to go on a diet. HOWEVER, if you're mad at ravens chocolate would surely help. Right?

As I was sitting there the sun came out! In Juneau that's a major thing. It felt like God did it just for me - and I began thinking - I thanked God that He has provided enough for us that we had two cans of trash. I think of all the places around the world where they have very little daily trash.

And I asked God to give me grace. This anger I felt was not graceful nor was it honoring to God.

Then I asked Him to help me be a better steward of the resources He has blessed us with.

For the LORD God is a sun and shield. The LORD gives grace and glory; He does not withhold the good from those who live with integrity. (Psa 84:11)